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beloved
November 2009 
Steve Sigur: 1946-2008 - Grieving the loss of one so dear to me
Satya-Seer
It happened sometime this past Saturday, July 5, 2008, that my friend, my mentor, me teacher, my soul mate, my protector, my great encourager, passed from this earthly plane. Steve meant the world to me, almost more than any other person, my mom aside. Here is the write up from the headmaster of the school.
I met Steve in, I think it was 1975, when I had received (was given) a scholarship to attend The Paideia School, in Atlanta, Georgia. Now, you have to understand that I was from a very poor family, and this opportunity seemed to fall upon me like manna from heaven. Upon meeting Big Steve as we called him, I immediately noticed the sparkle in his eyes and I felt this great connection. Now, Steve was this woodsy looking, unkempt, huge kinda guy who it seemed didn't really care much about his appearance.
He was very warm and didn't seem to take his eyes off of me. He wanted to know all me and how I had come to play the flute, and he seemed more genuine in his questions and listening than anyone I had ever be around previously. I was very happy to share ME with anyone who would listen. I didn't get that at home - well, maybe a little, but my folks didn't understand me. He immediately wanted to hear me play my flute, which I had with me, so I play it for him. Steve said that day that I was very talented and that he be honored to teach me and to learn from me. "ME?" I thought he was crazy at this point, because how could anyone learn from a 15 year old undereducated, underachiever, naieve, sassy, boy from the inner city ghetto who really had no sense of who he was?
Anyway, I attended the school and Big Steve became my advisor because I think the others weren't quite sure what to do with or even think of me. You gotta believe I was an odd fish in a new pond.
During my time at Paideia, a school that seemed so far out of my league or anything that I had previously thought I could have, aspire to, and ultimately reach by attending, Steve became WORLD to me. I struggled with trying to keep up with my peers who had been exposed to better education earlier in life than I had been exposed to. Steve took the time to teach me the importance of learning and how to become a life-long learner.
One day while on campus, Big Steve pulled out a book with lots of quotes written in it and wrote something down. I asked what he was doing and he said that he had always kept a quote book of inspirational sayings. Of course, with my curiosity I asked him if I could read it. He allowed me to take it home for the evening and I devoured it. That evening I started a quote book of my own and have since collected words of wisdom wherever I walk.
Steve kept me from being arrested the following year by distracting me from a situation that was going down. My mother had prompted him to help me on her behalf and he did. I'm most grateful for his showing up. See, my home was dysfunctional to the nth degree, a terrible environment for any child to grow up in. I was never embarrassed to invite Steve to my house because I knew that he would never judge me. He seemed to bring a bit peace when he came around.
So, these are some of the things that Steve taught me:
-to wander and be inquisitive and to question
-to dare to step beyond boundaries where people said I couldn't do or be that which I desired
-to share (he allowed me to play his professional flute all through high school)
-to feed people (I couldn't afford to go out like most of the well to do kids and Steve would often slip me money so nobody would see to prevent my embarrassment)
-to unleash my creative talent and let it fly free
-to believe in myself
-to love (this he taught me silently without words, with his actions)
-to search
. . . oh, and so much more . . .
I am the man I am today because of his influence in my life.
I was madly in love with Steve. Always was and always will be. Not the kind of romantic kiss-kiss love, but a love that knows no bounds that cannot be described with the utterance of words. He was a great man with a great heart and great soul.
I will miss his presence here in this life as I'm sure countless others will as well, but I know that he is a part of me, that he lives in me as I live in him. He has taken my music to soar with him in the heavens and I hold a part of his light for others.
If you want to see what this man meant to others, and look at his achievements, then just do a Google search. I've only given you an inkling of his profound life and how it touched me. My relationship with Steve was miniscule in the greater scheme of his life and accomplishments.
Today as I was thinking how sad I am, I could almost here Steve say, "It's okay to be sad." A quote from one of his earlier quote books was - "Those who have endeavored to teach us to die well, have taught few to die willingly; yet I cannot but hope that a good life might end at least in a contented death."
Johnson: Letter to Baretti (June 10, 1761)
Life and death are always with us, and those who have gone before us are too. They live on in our hearts and are echoed through our loving lips.
Another student wrote this about Steve.
Access: Public
My most sincere condolences on your loss….
Remember he lives on in you…. :)
You've memorialized him beautifully, friend. He would be so proud, and I'm sure he is.
what a life. so well lived though so short. and thank God for the changes he inspired in so many including you! it boggles the mind to think of the ever spreading ripples of influence
(((((John)))) how blessed you are and we through you
Cherish your memories.
Condolences
I Love You XOXO
My heart is holding you with tenderness as you grieve this loss.
XOX
Satya -Seer, who can celebrate a birthday; how poignantly you are celebrating one that is another kind of birth-day.
Thank you for sharing at this time.
I love and support you John. I am so glad we had him come hold court at the 1st Church of the Porch. I am so glad you got to see him again last week. He cherished you, it was obvious. I know many of those whose lives he touched and say he surely showed what unconditional love looked like. I know he inspired wonder in many. What a blessing and a gift he shared with all. I rejoice with you for a life well lived and know you celebrate his life, grateful for the rare treasures he bestowed to you and everyone and everything he touched.
John, what a lovely tribute to your friend, mentor, way-shower…all that you have expressed here is such a profound testimony to the character of this man. You have so eloquently shared with us a glimpse into this one life lived and how one life can make such a profound difference in another. Thank you and thank you, Steve, for being so kind and accepting…for being Light and Love.
My heartfelt condolences to you, John…and all that he touched with his life of Light.
Love and Hugs,
Starseed
John, I am grieving with you, my friend, for the loss to all of us of such a gentle and generous soul. Hope you find some peace and comfort here in the love of your friends. Your Steve memories are true gems. I know you will treasure them your whole life long.
Sending you much love,
Kat
A touching obituary of a very special man ! I understand that he must have been your Guardian Angel alive, but I also think and feel that he still is there for you, being a pillar for you from the arch of heaven. You describe a man who gave you boundess love which you needed, and remember - the energy we inhabit never dies - it gos on…!
Much love
Ane
John, I am grieving with you, i've set my intention and focus on your and my acceptance.
I too lost another dear friend to Cancer on Sat. July 5th…
Love and Hugs,
Lars
Thank you my dear friends for your touches. I'm at peace and calm, just living these emotions fully right now. If I don't answer right away, just know that I'm okay, just feeling a little thin energetically.
Meenakshi - yes, it is a birth-day of the most freeing kind.
Victoria posted a beautiful video entitled BE HERE NOW, about death and dying that was so beautiful that I listened to it several time last evening. I encourage each of you to take some time in your day to listen to this 8+min. gem. Thanks for that Miss V.
I appreciate and love each of you. Each of you live in me just as Steve lives in me. Thank you once again.
I am sorry for your loss, John.
It seems to me that Steve did no less than one great work–in you.
May you find comfort in a new manner of communication with Steve as he has passed now.
love and light, dear one,
CG
Grieving with you for your loss and here's my shoulder to cry on. But at the same time celebrating with everyone your wonderful friend's completion of his human experience and his departure as a beautiful soul. Through you we got to get a glimpse of Steve Sigur's well lived meaningful life.
Being dead in the physical world means being born in the Spirit world.
Steve, just like with the billions of humans that have “died” in this world since time immemorial, lives on in the Spirit world!
Let's be ready for our own grand re-birth into the Spirit world when the time comes.
Love & Light,
G3 :-)
I'm sorry for your loss. You wrote a nice tribute to him. He's proud of you.
Beautiful tribute to your Dear Friend. Here we are all with you, holding you close, dear one.
Much Love, Ayla
what a wonderful tribute and memorial to your friend…you are his mirror…
may your sadness be complete with the joy of all that you carry in your heart…when released into the Universe, know that you are releasing perfect love…
your testimonial is a testament to awareness and awakening…
always, star…
Thanks everyone. I feel like with each response that I've crawled up in your respective laps and placed me head next to your heart. It is comforting. As was reminded by Mila that this is a celebration of his completion as a human. Yes, and how complete.
Such a beautiful testimony and tribute to a wonderful man who achieved, gave and was so loved in his life,
I was so moved by your words and expression of deep connection to your soul mate and mentor/ true friend.
My heart goes out to you and I send you gentle hugs of comfort knowing that your love and caring will bring you strength and peace…
Love
Ange
I've pored over each of the links, and am gifted even sensing his essence. What a blessing to have had Steve contribute to your life. I'm the closest thing to jealous that I've been in ages - ha! I'm positive that the energy at the service tomorrow will be absolutely world-rocking. You are (and will be, especially tomorrow) in my thoughts. Namaste, John. Namaste, Steve.
sending warm, loving hugs….dear one. anything I can do for you?
namaste to you and your special friend who is on yet another adventure in yet another realm.
Namaste brother,
Lots of love to you… Thanks for sharing Steve with me…. he lives on through you….
Big Hugs
John, I am just reading this now. Stunned, awed, honored to be in the presence of this extraordinary beloved man through you.
Thank you for giving him to me. I am so sorry for your loss. I rejoice in his life saving love and regard for you.
I 'll be thinking of you all day tomorrow.
DC
John, your tribute to Steve was so moving and open-hearted. His life was full of goodness and meaning…thank you so much for passing it on. My arms are around you in love and support.
Thanks for sharing this beautiful story. It is truly a powerful teaching about how much influence one person can have in shaping another's life.
best wishes,
george
Blessings to you, dear John….reading your memories of your friend seems to have touched so many of us. The being of this person, his essence, the goodness he shared with you and so many others…..I think that's what really matters, in the end. He saw in you what you couldn't yet see in yourself. His life was precious by simply being true to himself. thank you again.
you wrote a beautiful tribute to your dear friend, and i am honored to witness it. my heart and thoughts go out to you now. i wish i had magic words to make it all easy, but i am at a loss here. sending you love and extending my hand in friendship, just like you have so many, many times.
You are truly blessed to have know such a wonderful friend, and he was blessed to have a wonderful friend like you.
Your heart is an envelope that will hold your memories.
Many heartfelt hugs and much love to you, my dear friend John…MANY!