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death
November 2009 
Shiny Sparkly Life, Duality, Death and other random thoughts. . .
Posted on Jun 27th, 2009
by 
Satya-Seer
Satya-Seer
I am thinking this morning that duality and non-duality are but One. I'm amazed at life and equally amazed at death. The sparkliness in the eyes of one so alive can be seen even at the point of death.
A few years ago I had the opportunity to sit with a dear friend who had many complications from AIDS and who was approaching his death with great awareness. He had said to me, "Look into my eyes as I am dying. I'll carry that sparkle of life on with me, even after I'm no longer here with you." WOW, I thought - what awareness. He didn't seem to be stuck in staying around in a body vehicle that was destined to die. But I sensed he knew that his spirit, that which animated him in this life, that his spirit would have no ending. He seemed to understand that duality as the appearance (some call illusion) of his operating in this world.
So, I'm looking at my garden, thinking how lovely and lively it is, and then I stoop down to pick up the dead leaves, that were once alive, and that now mulch the ground. Isn't it a strange feeling to see this around us daily. Rilke said, "Life and death at core are entwined . . . ".
I have grieved many friends and family who have made their transition from their earthly bodies, back into the dimension of pure spirit and each time there was a sense of joy (look at the duality in this), knowing that a spark of their appearance in life here that I got to witness, that a spark of their life would still live on. I sense and feel that once something is giving life, that it is always with us, hence the stories and remembrances that we have of those who have made this transition. I miss my mother and often say how I wish she were still here, but her spirit is still here, moving in me, and in everything that is re-membered, everything that was touched by her. Everywhere I see sparkles of her spirit, and in me I feel that her sparkle is not separate or dead, but alive, just as if she were in the flesh.
So, it seems that what we call lost to death is just a rearrangement of the property of the universe, in which nothing is ever lost. See, I am a non-dualist living in a seemly dualistic world, BUT IT IS ALL ONE. A leaf falls from a tree and does the tree grieve. Even in death we are supported. The leaf now feeds the very tree that gave it life. Another aha moment was my realization of a self-contained universe in which NOTHING IS LOST.
I'm really missing my Jeff this morning, even while he sits in jail and awaits an unknown outcome. I am thinking that life is not the same without him in my physical presence, but I still feel the spark of his being, his aliveness, even while he is not near me. And I feel a constant movement, moving me within it toward more experience of this life, of WHAT IS.
So, do we really lay down our life or do we lay down our bodies used in this life. I think the latter. I consider that laying down my life as laying down a sparkly experience within this bigger thing that will continue eternally. I can know this now and respond to it according to my understanding and my ability (RESPONSE-ABILITY), and try not to fear death. Death does not so much concern me about giving up this body, but pain does. Seems that spirit really wants to be here, experiencing life, and would like to stay as long as possible. Can we ever know the reason for this? I have thought that this was what was meant by GOD experiences GOD through us. And we are just a part of it, just as the trees, the rocks, the hurricaines, the stars, the planets, galaxies, rot, worms, birds . . . To me, it is all GOD, universal spirit, moving in and around what we call this agency of myself, ME, or us. So, in a sense there is no ultimate death of what is. The property just changes, the body changes and grows and moves into the next state. The next state is just another dual thing in our being, that will come and go, but the whole thing is without beginning and without end. So, I'll end here cause I'm not sure I said much anyway. Have a great day.
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This body is only a vessel, WE are eternal love and light.
Big Hug to you Sweet Brother John. Thanks for your beautiful post.
((((((((((JOHN))))))))))
Lb
Oh dear John !
This was a story of deep reflection that touched my soul. I know that you have qualities that are special and you manage to share them so wisely too.
Death is, for me, a difficult guest even if I know it will visit us all in the end. I struggle with this seemingly irretrievably lost sparkle because I can´t quite manage to believe this sparkle continues somewhere else when the soul has left its body. I´ve stood by my mothers and my fathers deathbeds looking for this sparkle, but I couldn´t recognize their flare, and I had difficulties with the thought of were their sparkles could have gone !! They were so emptied, just a vessel I have difficulties with in my mind. Somebody talks about a smile on the deads face ,or an appearance of tranquility, but they just looked so strange and emptied. And so they were, and so it shall be I know, because it would be more difficult to let them go otherwise. Anyhow; this transition is so hurtful and it is so difficult to let go. BUT, my hope and my faith are totally co-ordinated with yours, dear John, even if I´m not convinced. I will remember my beloved ones with joy and appreciation, remember everything that they were and achieved in life, and the love they gave, and they will live on in the deepest of my heart. And I also try to imagine them in heaven reunited with loved ones, and making their acquaintance with their further destinies. And yes, we are a part in a bigger plan when we manage to see things from a wider angle, not entangled in grief and despair. I certainly hope to get there some day when my troubled mind reach a steadier ground, and I certainly appreciate the wise words of yours……
Thank you for sharing your profound view of life !
Love and respect from
Ane <3
Thank you dear John for this wonderful blog.
I would also like to thank Ane for sharing her feelings so openly here in her comment.
I would like to ponder on both of your writings a bit. They're both deep and profound. I'm going to let it sink in a bit, perhaps I'll come back to it later.
Deep bows my friends.
Oh, Ane, I so agree with you too … it is difficult to let got and see the emptiness in the body, because that is the vehicle through which we have come to this other spirit, to talk to, to be with. I miss my mother daily and think of her often, but then known that there is so much of her in me, the things she gave of herself in her loving, that I now share with others. I do believe there is a place where we can reunite, if but in spirit or a different form. And sometimes I just cry, missing the physical touch of the ones I've loved. Nothing is excluded in this life - grieving, dying, sparkling … and they can all be intermixed in our coming and going. I love you Ane. You are a great authentic life! ;-D Thanks Lucienne.